After the Election

World Peace Ghosties…help us!

The day after. I am sitting in my kitchen, shoulders slumped in front of my laptop, trying to get up and do something, anything. I decide the best plan is to ride my bike to a midday yoga class. I arrive and find myself among 7 other traumatized souls and one teacher that aims to lead us out of despair and into the calm. One hour later, despite an eyes locked tearful moment with another yogi, we all float on out of there having shed some toxic weight.

It’s a beautiful day. I decide to ride to The Middle Eastern Bakery in Andersonville to get some of their delicious lentil soup and bread. While in the store, I see a guy on a bike and a woman standing on the sidewalk yelling at each other. It’s going on for about 5 minutes before I come out of the store and catch the tail end. I hear the woman, calling the bike rider a faggot several times before she jumps in her SUV and screeches away. The story goes, this woman, driving inconsiderately, double parked on Foster, and compromised this bicyclist’s safety. He said something, she gave him the finger, he told her she was being childish, she pulled out a knife and threatened him, then thought better of it and put it away, saying proudly “I hope Trump takes care of your faggot ass”.  Wow. Really? I tell him, I am so sorry this happened and hope he has a better day, but he replies that he is having a great day and enjoyed the confrontation.

Now the bike rider, who was the victim, becomes part of the problem. Nobody walks away from that feeling good. And I, who had never witnessed such a thing,  felt terrified that this was some kind of Trump ripple effect: Permission to publicly act out hatefully. I rode home, got in bed and went to sleep for two hours. When I awoke, all I wanted was to be with friends, or tell someone what happened that day. I couldn’t bear to be alone with my story. It felt disproportionately end of the world-like. Sometimes it just sucks to be alone and this was one of those times! Nobody answered their phones and finally I had to barge in on my downstairs neighbors. I talked, they listened, they talked, I felt better and I left them to eat their dinner.

The next day, I came to know that everyone was licking their wounds. I thought  I was being overly dramatic and tragic but no. Others were weeping and fearing too.  But now, something different is happening. Nobody wants to feel helpless and they are done crying. Instead I am being pummeled with inspirational Facebook posts and emails. We are drawn away from despair towards the light.

Yesterday,  I went to two stores: Trader Joe’s and Aldi. There was an unbelievable contrast in vibe. T.J.’s with all it’s super friendly employees and their happy music and general holiday cheer,  felt like an alternative universe. Like nothing had happened and if I just stayed in that store I might still be able to afford health insurance, and long will live pro-choice. Aldi, on the other hand, is a no frills reality. I’m in line and the guy behind me is talking to his friend and the bit I hear is “It feels so weird to be living in a time like this”. I turned my head slowly nodding, just naturally barging into his conversation. He said something else. Then the woman in line behind him joined in. At this point it didn’t matter what anyone was saying. I was struck by our solidarity. We strangers in this grocery store bonding. It felt comforting, beautiful and hopeful. Then again I have been walking around with the assumption that everyone I know agrees with me….until I got a message from a Facebook friend telling me otherwise. Whoops!

Today,  I went to Aldi again, because I needed to buy some medicine (chocolate!) When I arrived, I was greeted by a new security guard who graciously handed me a basket. He didn’t speak but he looked at me with a peaceful kindness. There was something in his manner that projected love and grace unlike his crabby pants predecessor.  Something told me he was not from this country…maybe an angel in disguise? He told me with his eyes, that I need to be nice to strangers. We all need to be especially, monumentally nice. It’s our new job. We must kill hatred with kindness and try to understand those that are different than us, even if the “difference” is,  they voted for Trump.